i went to watch Mission Impossible 3 yesterday at westmall! and went to play bball. = ]
o well.there isnt any room to rest even if there's a month of holiday. the most is to just relax and not work so hard.
but still have to study every night.

no more shopping, no more wastage of time already.

BUT I WANT

.......................................................................

-to attend........

................

TRUMPET CLASS.

....................

-to go for events during ........

........................

SG ARTS FESTIVAL.

..........................

-to watch my fav

.......................

MOVIES.

................

-to help out my section during

...........

BANDPRACTISES.

.....................

i was late for phy this mornin for 15mins. combined class with some other classes.
had maths lesson on Probability.
then chem also combined class.
freezing cold in the range room.
went home to sleep. very tiredd.
went westmall to study. 'cos tuition is postponed.
went to the library,wanted to borrow a book. but i owed the libary money. arghh. but i didnt have a cash card to pay off the debt.
then went home watched korean show. ;D

why always break promises?supposed to go out with her tomor,and yet again and again she cant make it.
she came back to sg, but we didn't have a time to chat, to go out, to have fun.
all we did was SMS.
and then you're so busy with all your friends here.
i missed those days you know.
i'm so upset la.
bid u farewell,byee.

UPSET LAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRHHHHHHH!
wake me up when october ends.

BOOHOOHEEHAA.
its been a while since i last post.
today had CHINESE 0 level paper.
He took away all my anxiety and worries.was really very nervous initally,
and He guilded me throughout my papers.

I WANNAAA PRAISEEE YOU! ( ;

well, i wrote 4 pages long for letter writing. and 3 pages for composition.
i didnt finish checking the words i dontknow from my composition. cos i really thought too much of what to write.
paper 2 was not difficult. much easier than expected.

went to fish's place watch movie.
then went home to sleep . z z z zz z
ate dinnner.
watched korean dvds.
online till now.
chatting with mr chen. -.-

tomorrow got extra class from 8am till noon.
going watch movie tomorrow ( :

my heart is pounding very fast.
i totally have no idea why.


He planned this to happen in my life.

we left the place at night.
i saw the sadness in her eyes.
this was the very first time she looked very upset with me over this.
she doesnt wants to talk to me anymore.
she doesnt even wants to sit with me in the bus.
i knew she's very dissappointed in me, her eyes tells me so.
she lost hope in me already.
how could this happen?
i was very upset at once.
i know many things were not right,
the way i wanted.
many obstacles popping up in my path.
i knew there was so much to do now.
why didnt i set my mind there?
why didnt i focus on what i really want?
that tear didnt drop.
i didnt want myself to be sobbing the whole night.
i hide all sadness deep inside my heart.
i turn to no one.

i'm not gona talk much anymore.
i'm not gona be so crazy and enthu in school anymore.
i dont want to be the last one standing there.
i dont want to dissappoint myself anymore.

tomorrow will not be a better day.
the results will be out after 230pm.


thankyou ms koh for the gift.

today we got back our chi mock exam papers. paper1 is marked by our tr,e rest we marked ourselves.thats dumb right. and i failed my compo cos i wrote out of point. i think was too rush ba,i left exactly an hour for compo.spent too much time thinkin for letterwriting i guessed. hmm. well. i didnt do well for the paper. argh. hai. i want to achieve B3 for chi 0 level. really. i dontknow if i can. o well. i've to give everything to Him, believin that He can help me. whole day chi. so i took short naps. we had assembly. quite nice skits. went to teach sec1 drills till 4plus. saw bdn and hougang band mates in my sch,learnin the flagpole thingy for the camp. went up to range room to see how's band doing. o well. rebecca was sayin her long long story -.--

OPUS III on 28th JULY

VICTORIA CONCERT HALL

730pm

$10/$15

support my band oKIES?

((:

went tuition at gombak. so went pass bukitgombak CC. went to see tuition chi tr there. anyway she's still there! she taught me since pri 4-6 on chi. o well. gave her a big hug. cos i lost contact wit her for four years already! imagine u meeting yr tr for many yrs. and exchanged no. she even intro me to her class cos she 's havin lesson w pri6 students. and we chatted quite a while. yeap. i miss her ! LUO LAO SHI ;p i rmbed she always call me HEI GU NIANG. cos i'm dark. and used to send me,the only student home after tuition till 10pm man. so so nice right. then e

rest of e students will jealous. ;p and always buy sweets and chocolates for me.

i'm tired.

tomor havin chi mock exam again.

i got scolded again.

i dont think ms koh is meeting tonight again.

CHARCOAL! ;p
snow and charcoal!

today i had chi mock exam paper. superslack. we didnt even separate our tables. and durin the listening compre, all of us went to range room and no tables man. so its like, we sat together w our friends. dumb right.how to prepare for 0s. and everything ended at 115pm. we walked out of class la.and went off. actually still got lessons de,but what's the point?? when there's already no maths lessons instead chi exams the wholeday. we also skipped eng oral. went to get hammies-
CHARCOAL AND SNOW ;p
slept till 530pm. feelin very pain in my head.. taken dinner already. hammies are sleeping now.
am havin AMATHS tuition tomor at westmall i guess so in the evening. just know that tomor need to teach sec1 drills in the noon. marching.turning.sizing command.and so on. while the rest have combine with mrlim. i want to hear the band one day!
so slack. tomorrow gona go through chinese papers WHOLE DAY. well, we need not bring any books. -.= got sch like no school la.



and i, am desperate for You.
and i, i'm lost without You.

the CHAMPIONS after BIGWALK ;p
one of the WALKER,- done by sentosa. promoting balloon hats festival in june ;p
the group of us. the lady in black is our form teacher, ms jane ;p so on right. 11 of us.
the girls. whahah.



the day at town!
daz-jan-khiang nannni nannnii pooooo poooo
pastamania. my spagetti is the best! ;p i want to go pastamania again!!
FeliciaAudreyDazireeStephanieJanice
at cineyleisure. ;p

i think stephanie fiish and i were appreciating the nice designs. while drey was searchin for smt in her bag. o.O

went Big Walk this mornin with some of my classmates. we met up like 6am? -.= so so early. we walked only 5KM instead of 10KM. ! =x and walked to Suntec for breakfast. shopped around., then took train back. dozed off .was feelin VERY LETHARGIC. met ade at lot1. went church together. bible study was great. then went to beauty world for lunch with jielong,kohtee and meiyan. took bus home. slept for 2hours only. i didnt went for work. i felt very bad man, cos siying already promised captain that i will come today. they needed people like ME ;p and there's weddin function today. arghh. so sorry so sorry. i gona be dead the next time i go there. x= but was really super tired la. i'm feelin tired now already. will sleep early but dontknow i will?

tomor whole day CHINESE MOCK EXAM and must bring dictionary for approval for usage for 0level paper.

oh weell.

its all bout YOUths!

i slept at 2am yesterday, watched some tv programme with dylan.

and woke up 730am and went for band. was in the music room durin sec1s combine with ms loh. was there to hear them. they played What A Wonderful World. my juniors are improvin, noel and hock huey's solo is SUPERB! hoho- i am happy for them. and also for 2nd trumpetors =D and overall, was not bad. but i feel that the sec1s lack of support from seniors' helps. that why their very fundamentals not there yet though they know how to play. maybe like they know what is dotted crotchet but cannot play to the exact value. sectionals with benny. seniors were focusing on Danse Diabolique and dances pieces. taught my juniors. and then i went to teach horn sec1s,. i talked to Sky yeap,finally i got the chance to talk to him. talk to him bout church and music theory which he didnt understand.oh no, his seniors didnt teach him bout key signatures and stuffs like that. taught the eupho sec1 girl too. i realised that seniors didnt spend much time with juniors,lack of communication and bonding which is very terrible that's happening in my band. and i am glad to see 90% of the sec1s bringing instruments home,even for those very HUGE instru like TUBA. am upset that seniors are not showing good example. my trumpet is already passed down to NATHASHA, so must take good care of that trumpet ;D

went to church later on. sky cant go last min. yaukun also.

the sermon was about emotions.. i thank God that i learnt and realised so much now. i might have been a really nasty person to some people in church baa. i allow my feelings to take control of me. i vent my anger or hate people who did somethings which i dislike.i always fear many things and let fear makes me feel very very afraid of anything. this was very very wrong of me. and i brought people nothing but troubles and burdens.

i dont want to trouble anyone already,.

i feel really terrible bout myself.

sorry people. i think i brought many problems to you people already.

CLUELESS <3>
mr lim knew that you n cat not playing
# CLUELESS <3>
he v shock
# CLUELESS <3>
he was like
# CLUELESS <3>
" HUH. MY TWO TRUMPETERS NOT PLAYING?!!!!!"
# CLUELESS <3>
then he silence.........................................................
# CLUELESS <3>
then he "ok lor."
# CLUELESS <3>
you sad, he oso sad
# CLUELESS <3>
yuting n sean oso out of opus
# CLUELESS <3>
YOU KNOW NOW OUR S4S ONLY GOT SEVEN PLAYING FOR OPUS.
# CLUELESS <3>
SEVEN ):
/i dont know anything, stop questioning,.i'm getting confuse. i miss this man. ; ( says:
WHICH 7
/i dont know anything, stop questioning,.i'm getting confuse. i miss this man. ; ( says:
HAI
/i dont know anything, stop questioning,.i'm getting confuse. i miss this man. ; ( says:
i dontknow
/i dont know anything, stop questioning,.i'm getting confuse. i miss this man. ; ( says:
i want to play foir opus, but i think n think. 3 times a week pracs, i canot even handle studies how to includ performance. n i think n think. i can go watc my band perform w fads
# CLUELESS <3>
me, charles, jordan, dor, aileen, amy, kexin
# CLUELESS <3>
aileen and amy oso want to leave already
/i dont know anything, stop questioning,.i'm getting confuse. i miss this man. ; ( says:
why?
# CLUELESS <3>
zeting oso
# CLUELESS <3>
zeting is in i mean
# CLUELESS <3 CLICK FIVE- says:
aileen and amy i dont know why
/i dont know anything, stop questioning,.i'm getting confuse. i miss this man. ; ( says:
oh, zeting in? good
/i dont know anything, stop questioning,.i'm getting confuse. i miss this man. ; ( says:
then now band strength can includ the sec1s mah
# CLUELESS <3>
dunno. i feel its very silly that we give up a concert which is in july, actually we shud be thankful its not august or sept which clashes with prelim
# CLUELESS <3>
i suspect mr lim oso maybe put july so that all the s4s can play
/i dont know anything, stop questioning,.i'm getting confuse. i miss this man. ; ( says:
he put there on purpose cos my bday leh
# CLUELESS <3>
-.-
CLUELESS <3>
mr lim told yuting n sean something when they told him they wanted to pull out
# CLUELESS <3>
he said, " if you think pulling out of opus will make your grades better, you'll have to think twice"

this was the chat between me and rebecca.well what can i say? i'm not prepared to play for OPUS,really. i'm not confident,neither does the band. and i feel that now i alr cant cope with studies cos i am not consistent. i dont like to study,, . whaha. but yesterday mr heng told me my chemistry is improving. ;D which really brightens up my dull day. ok. my trumpet's gone!! i'm givin it to MY SEC1 JUNIOR. !! why so fast!! tomor must tell them how to take care of trumpets PROPERLY. and benny's comin tomorrow for trumpet class! yeahh! and i really want to hear my juniors tomorrow. i'm excited bout going band tomorrow. and to teach the sec2s drills. hear the main band for combine if there's . tomorrow got alumni band too. ;D gona wake up very early tomorrow.
back to what i did today. ,
no school today. and i woke up so early, 930am -.-- cos they wanna meet out early today. we met at 1030am , went town. i bought a belt at far east which is bronze in color, drey bot the same as me. always copy me =/ then we went to eat at Pastamania . 7 of US =D my kor wanted to come, but he was sleepin at home! i met my dad at cineyleisure to get some money from him. he asked me go get ATM card so will be easier to transfer me money. ;D then we went taka shop. shopping always make me broke. so i didnt want to enter shops. then i went home. the rest went Marina Sq for Bowling. i wanted to go,cos they were indecisive wher to go. i already said i wanna go museum. z.z.z so i went home to SLEEP.!! slept till night. went downstairs to buy dinner.
supposed to meet MS KOH later. but, she last min had to go clubbing with friends. so so hip -.- and cool la ! this teacher rock ;] so meetin her next week. bored at home. yes. i cannot wait for BIG WALK on this comin SUNDAY! ;p

FELICIA.AUDREY.DAZIREE // 12MAY SENTOSA . stephanie did not comeee .
remember the old d4rliNZ ? yeap. and my korr. in school yarp. acting cool laaa.
2 years ago we went sentosa. the good old memoriesss ;D
this is my class, and my group- FADS. we were previously called d4rliNz. us with math tr, Ms Teo. i looked very cute right. ;D
when we were much youngerrr. ohh. this is childishh -=.--
supporters who came to support me durin my concert ;p
after sports day. i remember this bunch of people. funny guys who graduated already. crazy girlswho are sec4s now in sch.. i miss all of u.
after cross country ,taken 2years ago too. the lady in red, is CHANTELLE. ms koh yarp. my bestie aka teacher .wahhaha =D
this was the concert with bedoknorth - Music from our Hearts. at CPCC =p my section, i love you guys man! we were doing some gimmicks for Hawaii-5 0 and turned out likethat.

HAPPY BDAY DARYL KORRRRRRR! ;D

i havent got yr present and STOP askin can?! ;]

durin cme lesson, ms ong was talkin bout the key points of Marriage. class seating arrangment changed. i'm sitting with sean and yiterk. behind me is FASJ. we had PE. for 3weeks we didnt had pe, and now it felt so weird. i played captain ball,volleyball,badminton. then so bored, i went to the canteen to sleep! so tiredd. it felt like there's no lessons.

durin chinese lessons, 5 chinese classes went to rifle range.combined chinese class! so so cool. but then i felt asleep laa. mdm zhao was talkin to us bout CHINESE 0 LEVEL. Okay. next MON and WED are Mock Examinations in the school hall. which means papers 1,2 and 3 from 8am-130pm. so no lessons. and on TUES and THURS are going through the papers. Mon must bring chi dict to be approved by examiners. o.O okay. everything seems so cool huh. but in fact we will miss out alot for maths and amaths. and Friday will resume lessons as per normal. and the following monday Chinese 0 level. today we were totally crazy in sch! cos last day of this week?
NO SCHOOL TOMORROW!
durin physics we did practicals. i love practicals. crazy fadsj. mad people. screamming.yelling.laughing super loud. nanniinnaniii poo poooo.
just took dinner and taken my nap. kor woke me up, asked me to lend him 10bucks. guessed what i thought? i thought i was late for school laaa!! -.-" was in my dreams man. he owed ME 30 bucks already!! -.-" tomorrow gona meet my dad to get money from him. i broke alr. i spent 40bucks this weekk. i watched movie.thats why. i want to watch DAVINCICODE.its out today. maybe watching alone? i dont think people wanna watch with me except jiayao.! haha! he asked me want to watch. he even asked me want to go National JC Open House on sat! and Hock Leong asked me go trekking tomorrow! so many dates =x woops. haha. what are classmates for then?? i love them! =D YEAH. 3 MOREdays to BIG WALK! so so cool to go with so many classmates TOGETHER. and my form teacher MS JANE is going too! so so cool!
where should i go tomorrow? ? ? ? ?

i know. i dont know. i dont want to question why. i'm afraid out there.

these words hurt me.

HAMHAM IS DEAD. 16may06

she was motionless there,sleep in her death.

life is just like that. one moment you might be laughing.one moment you might be crying. there's always the Ups and Downs. and you wont know what will happen next. *upsets*

today we reported to school at sgpoly at 815am. we got duties to do.so we sat jus behind the speakers and teachers' seats. didnt sit with fadsj and they even booked a seat for me =( i love the speaker, Mr Perkins from Republic Poly. the way he speaks really can capture our attention and very funny. i love the talk by Nanyang Poly regarding nursing.,. and am motivated by Penny Tan's talk. in fact she was the first student in sg to enter university after her medical science course. then the whole talk ended around 3pm includin the tour in SP. the emcee ,amin was good!actually fads going to Jurong Point. but then so last min,they backed out , left me in the train.
why always like that? i felt really left out by so many people in my school now.i felt that i hav no friends now. i dont hang out with them anymore. i feel what really friends are. , are the people in my church. what's more, the conversations in school with friends are all bout the world,the guys,the trends, the rumours and every other things. i dont want to be influenced by the world. i want to be a good testimony!
i took train to BoonLay, wanted to go JP but i knew i will spend money again. so i took train to jurong to change train.but i forgot so took till clementi. lol. and then to cck. went to buy drink and eat junk food before headin home.

tomorrow lessons' as usual =(
tomorrow got band SEC4s drills practise session with zeting!whaha.he's so BIG now! hopefully all of us turn up yeah.

MS KOH'S BACK FROM CHINA FOR 4 MONTHS THERE! i miss her. i talked to her over the phone once she touched down. i missed her voice. i gona meet up with her very soon.

ILOVEYOU ;p

school seems bored today.i sleep and sleep. there's no lessons. free time all the way. at 1130am till 230pm, checked through ALL the papers! that's crazy.in a day's time. arghh. english markin scheme is so so strict,although i passed.i dont like. i got 18 for compo, 17 for letterwriting. summary and compre is terrible laa.think lotsa of people failed that section. and also chinese compre section markin is so so strict! i scored so little. =( i dislike my marks,i shall practise more on MATHS AND AMATHS noww. after school i went to MARINA SQUARE with my bandmate. passed by ade's SANDWICH SHOP. i watched Jasmine Women. i love ZHANG ZIYI,she's so so pretty! returned home bout 730pm. i ate maggie mee for dinner.drank cranberry+black currant drink.so healthy! =p my hamham is dying already. arghh.someone help her can can. lack of nutritions, so so skinny now. how how howw!! maybe too lonely, .

pray hard for my hamham. i want HER to survive! she's so completely different now. the way she sleeps. ,she stands on 2 feets, and lean against the wall.

TOMORROW REPORTING TO SCHOOL AT SP. and then i got duty to help the teachers to organise this and that.,so must report at 730am. if not i can reach there at 815am. ;]

BIG WALK 21st MAY.
FELICIA's BDAY 28 MAY.
chinese 0level paper 29th MAY.

this mornin i woke up to sweep and mop the floor. =p i'm doing smt for my mom! took cab with stef and meiyan to church for biblestudy. book of Judges is interesting! then cellgroup mates went to eat prata opp. church. i love kampong fried rice! took bus to panjang resevoir. just went there to stroll, and then walked to panjang plaza. lol. we ate icecream at cafe cartel! VIKING ROCK! whaha. 10 scoops of chocolate and vanilla and rockss ;] went to see dogs and hamsters! i want to buy nice nice food for my hamham at that shop, but then i spent finish my money already. i want to buy CHOCOLATE DROP for hamham! recently neglected her alot, 'cos i so busy, no time to bring her out to stroll and sayang her =( sorry hamham! i was late for work, i reported at 650pm =x supposed to be 630pm. so i didnt get to do the walk-in with the dish as there's weddin function. siying got to do it la,! i was supposed to be the one pourin hot water into the areas for the dry ice so got smoke,. but then i was busy. arghh. my job kept on changing. first was incharge of VIP room, then changed to bartender. i love to pour beer!! cos of e way u hav to pull down the handle, and slant the jars so there wont be much bubble. yeah. today 's pay was an hour $7. then manager asked me can type up my hair at the side, i said cannot.lol. she said orh,yr style right,so messy.lol. then so many of the waitress said i so dark,teased me =/ i wasnt workin with the devil, so i ignored.heh. ;D i dont llike the people workin in the kitchen.so rude.so vulgar.zzz. then i went yewtee 7-11 bought cheesecake as mother;s day gift for my mom. she jus fell asleep, so kor woke her up.and i gave to her. =p dylan's sick again. i just had dinner,. want to sleep soon. tomorrow i gona get my results. =( i dont want to knowww.
i spent bout 80bucks this week.! always anyhow spending/ humphs! i want to saveeee.

i went bedoknorth so early in the mornin today. and surprisingly,the trip took me less than an hour to reach bedok. i miss the people over there.i passed yonglin the SAFband cd recordin and the trumpet recordin cd. the security guard wanted me to wrote my name on the list cos i was an outsider. but then was so coincidence that the band teacher was there, he told the guard that i was from REGENT WIND SYMPHONY. oo, he knows me? so cool la.there's so many people and yet he rmbs me although i didnt talk to him before.maybe was my skin color. =p and i saw our thai-drills-instructor, MR CHAKRIT.!! i missed him and he remembers me! then iwent to the shop opp. the sch for breakfast. and i met shulin later onn. think she's going to her sch or smt. went church with liying.and the whole trip fr bedok to church took us 1hr10mins.

i love the sermon today,
i love every sermon,
i love going church,
i love my sisters and brothers!!

we celebrated kohtee,dris,cheryl and jielong's bday!and then played games after dinner.heh.
i invited 5 friends to church today.but they gave me excuses. pray that they will come next sat. i also want to invite fadsj to church even though they are catholics. i want to reach out to more people, even online friends or sch mates. or bandmates fr other schools.

something we shared durin cg game- some things which people don't know bout me :
1. my bday falls on a saturday22july.
2. my form teacher 's a christian.
3. my index no. is 12.
4. i like to watch movies alone.
5. i like to cycle to my friend's place at bukit panjang.

i got work tomorrow. hopefully i can dont attend the mornin shift and go for bible study!

sentosa12may. the eight of us. darren.felicia.audrey.wenyan.daziree.jude.zhuofeng.eric
i love them! stephanie's missing...
audreyyy and dazzz =p
fishyyy and dazzz
zhuofeng and me. i love dark chocolate maltesers!

i woke up so early today.-7am. we went for breakfast and took 188 to harbourfront. sentosasentosaSENTOSAAA! we played volleyball and frisbee and a very stupid game which makes our feets painful man. went swimming and things like that. i dislike sea salt water though. i got sun burnt, on my body and faceee. zhuofeng and eric caught crabs,fishes! they even saw octupus near the rocks there. oawwwh. we left there at 4 plus. and then whatt, we bathe in the outdoor bathing area in the ladies' toilet. -.-" went harbourfront shopping centre for dinner. then i went cityhall myself, walked around. and went home.


at times , i just want to be with You alone.
sometimes i dont understand why situations are happening in this way,
but i know , You make the situations according to Your way.
i know i have You.
i want to endure to see Your Smile at the end of the finishing line.